A leader never stands taller than when they kneel to serve their team.
Humility, at its core, is “a modest or low view of one’s own importance; freedom from pride or arrogance.” In plain language, it’s not about putting yourself down, it’s about lifting others up. It’s knowing your strengths without letting pride run the show. Humiliation, on the other hand, is “the act of causing someone to feel ashamed and foolish by injuring their dignity or self-respect.” That includes the way you speak to yourself, talking yourself down or belittling your own worth. One tears people down; the other builds them up. That’s why humility is not weakness. It’s strength under control. It’s choosing to use your influence and authority to serve, not to crush.
In fact, it takes a sharper mind and a stronger heart to practice humility. Why? Because it requires putting your pride and ego aside. And that’s not easy. Pride is hard to recognize, especially as you gain power or wealth. It has a way of sneaking in and wrapping itself around your identity without you even realizing it.
A great story Jesus told that captures this is the story of the rich young ruler (Matthew 19:16, 22, Mark 10:17, 27, Luke 18:18, 23). This man came to Jesus asking what he had to do to inherit eternal life. Jesus told him to sell all he had, give to the poor, and then come follow Him. But the man walked away sad because he couldn’t let go of his wealth.
That’s the perfect picture of leadership without humility. The rich young ruler thought he had it all, wealth, position, influence, but when it came down to releasing his pride and possessions, he couldn’t do it. His self-importance blinded him to something greater. That’s exactly what happens to leaders who cling to power, titles, or the image of always having the answers. They think they’re protecting themselves, but in reality, they’re holding themselves back. I often think, if that young ruler had trusted Jesus and let it all go, he would have been blessed ten times over.
The reason I can speak about this so strongly is because I’ve lived it. When I first started my business, I was a humble young man with no money, staying in prayer daily. I told God everything I had was His, my business, my family, my life. I was grateful. But over time, I became fearful. My identity got tied up in the company’s success. I became restless, irritable, and discontent. I was more focused on keeping the business alive than leading with humility. I started looking for problems in others, quick to give solutions, but not in a way that built people up. I had become exactly the kind of boss I swore I’d never be.
I made serving my business more important than serving the people in it. And it left me miserable. It cost me a marriage. I lost half of my son Caleb’s childhood. I was already sleeping at the office, obsessed with numbers and growth. Yes, the company was making money and thriving on paper, but the culture was cold. Turnover was high. Nobody would’ve called Spike a “second home.” It was just a paycheck.
That went on for years until I hit an emotional bottom. My second marriage was starting to feel like my first, because I was treating my wife more like an employee than a partner. Around that time, my business partner Robert Hodson asked me to read the story of the rich young ruler and Ephesians 5. Looking back, it wasn’t Robert, it was God using him to reach me. Because at that point, I had turned success and busyness into an idol without realizing it.
“If the devil can’t take you over with pride and ego, he’ll take you out with busyness.”
When I read those scriptures, I fell to my knees. I asked God for forgiveness. I realized I had been taking credit for everything the company, the success, even the shoes on my feet. None of it was mine. It was all His. My businesses, my wife, my children, my team, every bit of it had been entrusted to me, and I hadn’t been a good steward.
Humility in leadership isn’t weakness. It isn’t a lack of confidence. It’s being honest about your limitations, recognizing your faults, and remembering you’re human just like your team. It’s walking with people through their mistakes instead of berating them with ego and selfishness. It’s keeping your eyes fixed on a mission bigger than yourself.
In a world full of chest-thumping bosses and me-first managers, humility is countercultural and that’s exactly why it’s so powerful. Teams don’t crave perfection; they crave authenticity. Humility builds trust, creates safety, and fuels a culture where people can bring their best.
The Core Issue:
Every leader wrestles with ego. It sneaks in disguised as strength but usually comes from fear, fear of being wrong, fear of losing control, fear of looking weak. I’ve felt it myself: the urge to prove I’m the smartest in the room, to protect my authority by pushing my way through. But every time I operated like that, I ended up isolated, frustrated, and wondering why my team wasn’t fully bought in.
Pride builds walls. Humility builds bridges. Leaders who refuse to admit mistakes don’t look strong, they look fragile. Ego quietly kills growth, both for us and for our teams.
A Real Story:
Early in Spike Electric’s growth, I hit a season where projects were slipping and cash flow was tight. I was stressed, angry, and convinced I had to figure it all out myself. My team would bring me problems, and instead of listening, I cut them off and barked solutions. I thought I was being decisive. Really, I was shutting down the very people who could help me most.
One day a senior manager pulled me aside and said, “Cole, the team doesn’t feel like you trust them. They’ve stopped bringing up ideas because they know you’ll shoot them down.” That stung. My pride wanted to argue, but deep down I knew he was right.
The next week in our leadership meeting, I did something different. I opened by admitting: “I’ve been leading wrong. I’ve been shutting you down instead of hearing you out. That’s on me. I need your help.” The room went silent for a second, then people started opening up. Ideas started flowing again. And you know what? The solutions were better than anything I could have forced through on my own.
That moment taught me humility isn’t soft, it’s strong. My authority didn’t shrink when I admitted fault, it grew. It showed my team that I trusted them, and in return, they leaned in harder. Humility unlocks loyalty and creativity in ways ego never can.
The Principle:
Humility is strength under control. Its power pointed at the good of others. It means taking ownership instead of making excuses, sharing credit instead of hoarding it, and staying teachable no matter how high you climb.:
Here’s the paradox of leadership: the moment you admit you don’t have it all figured out is the moment your influence multiplies. People don’t need a flawless leader; they need a real one. They’ll follow you further when they know you’re willing to listen, admit mistakes, and adjust.
Practical Action Steps:
So how do you actually practice humility this week? Try these:
- Admit a Mistake Publicly: When you drop the ball, own it in front of your team. No excuses. Say, “That’s on me, and here’s what I learned.” Accountability starts at the top.
- Ask for Feedback: Sit down with a teammate and ask, “What’s one thing I could do better as your leader?” Then shut up and take notes. Don’t defend yourself, just listen.
- Shift the Spotlight: Call out someone else’s contribution publicly this week. Celebrate their win by name. People will run harder for a leader who shares credit.
- Serve Tangibly: Do something “beneath your title.” Step into the trenches, take on a small job that shows no task is below you. Humility is louder in action than in words.
- Use Humble Language: Phrases like, “I might be missing something here,” or, “What do you think?” signal you value others’ perspectives. They invite dialogue instead of dictating.
- Mentor with Transparency: When coaching, don’t just share victories, share failures too. Talk about what you got wrong and how you recovered. Vulnerability multiplies trust.
Small actions, repeated consistently, rewire your culture and rewire you. Humility is built through practice.
Grounded Wisdom:
Scripture says it straight: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” Pride blocks progress. Humility opens doors.:
The longer I lead, the more I see this truth: the leaders who climb the highest and last the longest are the ones who know how to bend low. Humility makes you approachable, keeps you learning, and grounds you when success tempts you to drift.
Money and titles might earn compliance, but humility earns loyalty. And loyalty is what builds a business that lasts.
Brutally Honest Self-Reflection:
Here are some tough questions to sit with:
- Am I leading for a mission bigger than myself, or do I secretly make it about me?
- When was the last time I admitted I was wrong to my team?
- Do I actually listen to feedback, or just wait for my turn to talk?
- Would my people describe me as humble? If not, what would need to change?
Be honest. Pride is sneaky. It shows up in small ways, interrupting, deflecting, taking more credit than you give. Spot it and strip it out.
Final Word:
Humility in leadership is more than a nice idea; it’s a survival strategy. Empty yourself of ego, and you’ll be filled with trust, respect, and real influence. The leaders who inspired you most weren’t perfect, they were real. They made you feel seen and empowered.:
Your legacy won’t be measured by how many followers you had, but by how many leaders you raised. That’s what humility produces: multiplication.
So tomorrow, as you walk into work, take a breath and remind yourself: It’s not about me. Then lead with open hands and an open heart. Serve your team. Share the credit. Admit the mistake. Listen before you speak.
Because in the end, the leaders who stoop to serve are the ones people will never forget.
Recent Comments